Over this weekend, I was at a women’s church retreat. It was absolutely beautiful. Nature surrounding us; the feeling of God’s wind blowing to let me know His presence was there.
At one point I prayed with God so earnestly, I felt the Holy Spirit with me. I asked Him to reveal a memory to me.
What He chose was a recent traumatic memory for me. One year ago. I thought I had forgiven my transgressors and moved on from it! But when He revealed it to me, I felt the sharp pain I felt in that moment. The feelings of betrayal and rejection resurfaced. The feelings of unworthiness came back to light.
I challenged God to show me where He was in those moments of great suffering. He was right next to me. Embracing me closely like a Father should. Comforting me as the pain was coursing through me. It was intense trauma for me. Even more traumatic than my brain injury!
He then showed me, to remind me, of when I met Jesus. That will be a later post because it’s time I share that with you. It’s time I stop selfishly keeping the glory of God to myself. But to end it, Jesus already knew what was coming ahead. With the expressions of deep care and concern on His face, he said, “have faith, daughter.” I always treasure that time and I always will.
But at the end of my alone time with God, I found it deep within my soul to forgive and to pray a blessing over all who worked against me. Now it’s time to let my light shine fully.
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